Rant

I’ve decided to write another blog. I drank a can of coke, now I don’t have 3g reception so I have nothing better to do than write. I can use Braille Screen Input, so I can type so much faster! I’m using contracted Braille now so all the better!!!! I basically want to vent about how I feel about living in a sighted world. I don’t think it’s that bad, except some people obviously think I’m fucking stupid, which I’m clearly not! My roommate which I won’t name on here, well she thought she could get away with anything here! Well, when she realised it wasn’t the case, she left quick smart! Haha there’s no skin off my nose, I just have a cleaner unit without her spoiling it on me. She’s fully sighted yet she’s dirty and unhygenic. Go figure. I’m not the most perfect housekeeper either, but at least I try to stay clean. This person hopefully won’t come back to live here anytime soon, I can’t bear her habits. She eats rotten or stale food, she makes the place dirty and leaves it to me to clean up while denying that it’s a pigstye. I liked her company, but she’s a horrible roommate. I like my own space, I like a clean place to come back to. i like to keep the place secured so no bastards can steal my stuff. I also like to make sure I don’t lose utensils all the time. She’s a fucking pain in the arse really. I’m kinda glad she isn’t here. None of my things ever goes missing when I’m the only one here. I honestly think that nameless lady just wanted to see what she could get away with. Many people try to play the innocent card around me because they think they can get away with being horrible because of my blindness. I think it’s the most childish attitude to have. Why people can be like that around people with disabilities, I won’t ever understand. I can just imagine people thinking, oh yeah, that lady wouldn’t let me do this or that, how the hell did she know I was up to no good when she can’t see? Um… Well, one, I wasn’t born yesterday, and two, I’m blind, not fucking stupid! It’s funny how a lot of people just want to be friends with me if they think they can take advantage of me. This is exactly the reason that makes me hate people.

The weather is lovely today. Winter is slowly coming in, although Cairns never gets harsh winters. But I won’t need to use the air conditioner now for a good while. When it’s been a couple of weeks of not using the aircon, I’ll unplug it and leave it till I need it next time, which I hope will be months away. The less power I use, the better! The money that builds up in the power bill account would be better off in my pocket if it’s not being used. I want to save up as much as possible in case I move out. Hopefully I won’t have, but it’s another unknown for me, so I’d rather have money than be stranded. The other thing is, I won’t be paying my phone bill next week. I won’t pay for a broken Internet service. I’m already spending 90% of my pension money on rent next week. Believe me, I won’t fuck around! If I get kicked out for whatever reason, I’m fucken leaving with no bloody regrets!!!!!!!!!! And Troy and the budgie are tagging along with me at any cost. I didn’t get a guide dog or the bird just to frigging trash them. No bugger everyone, it’s not fucken happening! I’ll happily live on the street and not pay rent. I don’t need to suck nipples in order to survive. I’m big enough and ugly enough to fend for myself.

I’m going to charge my talking GPS. I need it when I get on a bus tomorrow. I wanna see how well I go with it. It’s been a few years since I used a GPS on the bus, so I hope I get it worked out. I want to use it to travel around a lot more. It’s sad that I can’t take Troy with me on buses now, I’d make sure he gets a good walk every day! Maybe living on the street will force us to exercise a lot, we won’t have a choice but to walk everywhere every day haha! I can find places where there’s Wi-fi zones and I know a few takeaway joints which are good to eat at. Hopefully I won’t go homeless, but hey, I’ll survive if I do. The world isn’t made for blind people so I figure that I should live my life however I wish without regrets while I still have the chance. We can only live once! I really want to go out now actually but I don’t want to leave Troy at home. I think I’d rather walk across a busy car park with Troy, just so I won’t have to catch a bus. The shops down the road are close, but the traffic is bad. I’ll have to work it out. I can’t just neglect Troy while I go out and have fun. I’ve just interrupted writing to make eggs on toast. I wasn’t very hungry because of having a big feed earlier, but I needed something to go with my period pain medicine. So I had three eggs on three pieces of toast. It was beautiful! I love flipping eggs, the yoke gets so hot and runny. I was taught how to flip eggs when a Japanese relief support worker told me never to eat fried yoke that hadn’t been cooked properly first. From that time on I always flip eggs to kill all the germs! And I love the taste. Now I’m back on the couch feeling peaceful because my period pain isn’t out of control. I feel normal, not overly sick or anything. I’m a bit tired, but not in an agonizing way. I could go out at the flick of a switch if I wanted to! Yet at the same time I could just lie down and crash. But either way, I don’t feel horrible. I feel terrible about not paying rent on time but sometimes it can’t be helped. The eggs on toast did me good, so I won’t need to worry about food until tomorrow. I’ll be ringing Centrelink first thing in the morning after breaky, I want to sort that crap out sooner rather than later. I’m angry really. From the start I should have said that only I’m renting, that way I wouldn’t be going through this fucking hassle now that my roommate has left. I’m very fucking pissed. Next time someone stays with me, I’m not telling Centrelink about it because most people aren’t as loyal and trustworthy as they first seem. Fucking humanity! There’s only a few people who aren’t on my hate-humans list. Lol most of the world has gone to the dogs.

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