Up early!

I woke up at five o’clock this morning. Strangely, I didn’t want to go back to sleep! So I got out of bed feeling slightly groggy but quite awake at the same time. I made a coffee and stood outside while the sun was coming up. It’s so nice to be up at the crack of dawn. It’s just that most mornings I like to sleep in so I miss out on that beauty. But yesterday after failing a crockpot meal miserably, I’ve decided that getting up very early to start a stew or whole chicken or whatever, would be better because by afternoon I can leave it to cool off when it’s done, and still get time to make a meal out of it before dark and I won’t burn myself. I wrote a status on Facebook telling everyone I’d never cook again, so people started joking andjeering. Two people were consoling though, actually my Aunty suggested chicken curry, but it was too late. The mess was cleaned up and I got rid of it because the pot was half fullof fluid for God’s sake. Oh well I’ll buy some stuff todday and make another attempt at it tomorrow. Very early in the morning that is.

The birds are singing nicely. They’ve been at it for an hour now. In the meantime I drank coffee, and then decided that the frog in my throat was making too much annoyance for me, causing me to choke and gag a bit, almost spewing up. So I puta medicated lolly down my gob, and the almost-spewing-up-choking sort of cough is calmed down to just that annoying cough which isn’t so severe now. The good thing is I haven’t needed to take the medicine every three hours like I had been doing three days ago. It’s just that when the cough comes on, it hits bad and suddenly. That horrible throwing up feeling isn’t as constant either except when I’m coughing badly, but that’s under control now, and I haven’t needed nurofen or Panadol since yesterday morning. Hopefully I won’t need that again till my period starts in a week or two. That reminds me, when I go to a cousin’s wedding in two weeks, I need to remember my supplies in case that issue comes on when I least expect it. Besidesthat shit life is all right. It’s a bit cold oout here at the moment, but summer is coming in so the chill is discipating. I’m pretty definite that I’ll be creating a very big electricity bill this year, and I told the family over dinner last night that I felt this way. I ate dinner at my cousin’s house, it was so delicious. Then desert was the most delicious ice-cream cake ever! I want that every year, but my other favourite cake is New York baked cheese cake! In fact I want both those cakes next year. And so I’m one year older, but I don’t feel a day over twenty. That must be a good sign. It’s funny how people get older but they don’t actually feel older. They just know they’re getting older. Oh well Nan is wrong then, she reckons you can tell you’re ageing. I no longer believe her. Just because you know you’re old because you can’t run like you used to, or it’s hard to get up when you fall, doesn’t mean you have to feel old generally. I now believe ageing is as much psychological as it is physical. I’m glad that Nanna and Pop choose to have a different outlook than me, and a negative one at that. Well good luck to them. I choose to have an outlook that promotes happpiness and well-being and some peace to look forward to every day. I think people who get negative and inward as they agge are misery-guts and selfish at heart. It’s fine to feel a bit sad about getting older, but getting self-centred and bitchy about it fixes nothing. I do put some exceptions to that rule if the ageing person has a condition or other disease which debilitates them. It’d be hard not to be selfish a bit then, anybody would be shitted right off at the fact they’d have to face and uncertain and bleak future that should be healthy and somewhat happy so they can die with good memories instead of in pain and discomfort and with bad memories of doing nothing and trying to fix what ispermanently broken. That would kill me inside too. But as for the general population of old people, happiness and good quality of life should be the goal.

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